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Six New Year's goals for those beginning to end their marriage

New Year's resolution or not, many of us take stock at the beginning of a new year and consider what we might want to do differently going forward. Our goals for the coming year are informed by events, good, bad or otherwise, of the year prior.

If your physical health took a downward turn in 2018, you may consider beginning a diet and exercise routine.

If 2018 brought increased credit card debt, you may consider beginning ways to save money.

For many, the goal for 2019 is beginning the process of ending their marriage.

While it's natural to think of divorce as an end, it important to remind yourself that it is also the beginning of a new you. Here are some great goals to keep in mind as you trudge through this year of significant transition.

Six goals for the new year

1. Forgive. Forgive yourself. Forgive others. We all make mistakes, and withholding forgiveness won't help you heal.

2. Read. People have always coped with life's challenges by seeking distractions. Instead of watching television or playing games on your phone which can affect your sleep cycle, read or listen to a book. The scientific community has evidence that reading is beneficial.

3. Limit social media. Unfollow people or news sources that make you feel down. Not only will this improve your mood, it is highly recommended that those going through a divorce limit their digital footprint. The last thing you want is a tweet about your ex being used against you in court.

4. Be selfish. This isn't the year for you to take care of others first. You deserve self-care. Put yourself first this year by saying no when you don't want to do something.

5. Be silent. Silent retreats are in vogue, and for good reason. Going somewhere by yourself for a weekend can be incredibly fulfilling. Remind yourself that you are enough, you always have been.

6. Reconnect. Often, being in a relationship means you have less time for others. If you find yourself with more time on your hands and have the desire, reconnect with old friends. There is evidence to support that well connected people are happier, and live longer.

The purpose of these six goals is to give you a launching off point. Realize the power you have over your own life and take back as much control as you can. More control over your choices can be empowering and have a positive effect on the rest of your life.

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